The 80's Called: Go-Go

Looks like the 80's just ain't going nowhere, fast, as this week showed people still want their Starlog Magazine, 8-bit video games, VHS movie trailers and schlocktastic studio of the future, Cannon Films.  So cancel your Saturday night date, break out the 2-liter of Shasta and crank up the synth wave as we round up all things great eight...ies.

- Non-profit The Internet Archive out of San Francisco looks to provide historians, scholars and the general public permanent access to digital records.  Amongst their archives are over 200 issues of Starlog Magazine, the publication devoted to science fiction films, books and television series that had it's heyday in the 80's.  Started by Kerry O'Quinn and Norman Jacobs with a later assist from David Houston as a one off guide to Star Trek, Starlog expanded into regular printing and ran from 1976 to 2009 for 375 issues.  The company also published Comics Scene and Fangoria, focusing on comic book adaptations and horror films among other titles.

- The Internet Archive also unveiled over 900 8-bit coin-operated arcade game titles emulated for online play.  As mall arcades died out in the 90's, you can save your quarters and spend your free time playing classics like Bionic Commando, Street Fighter II, Galaga, Golden Axe, Q*Bert, Dig Dug and Burger Time online instead.

- Speaking of video games, remember River City Ransom?  The Double Dragon-esque NES beat'em up game where you went around punching dudes with brass knuckles and eating ramen?  An officially licensed sequel, Underground, is on the way via a successfully funded Kickstarter campaign that revisits and expands upon Alex and Ryan's army'ing into River City looking for a kidnapped girlfriend.

- YouTube masher upper extraordinaire Chiefbrodyrules dropped his latest creation, a VHS, 80's style trailer for Captain America: Winter Soldier.  Complete with Cannon Films logo, tracking lines and synth soundtrack, Brody culls footage from the Cap flicks, Avengers, Robocop, Scott Pilgrim VS The World, Machete and Nick of Time to create an awesome time capsule made way outside the actual era.

- And we can't reminisce about the 80's without talking about Cannon Films now can we?  It's been a busy year for the former Go-Go boys of Hollywood with two documentaries hitting screens heightening their profile and the passing of co-founder Menahem Golan cementing their legacy.  After several years in the making, Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films finished production and began rolling out at various film festivals.  Featuring interviews with studio staples and stars like Michael Dudikoff, Dolph Lundgren, Tobe Hooper and Sam Firstenberg; the love letter to pre-sold, hastily made, schlocky exploitation fare sure to include nudity, action and or horror has been a hit with viewers.

Founders Golan and Yoram Globus were scheduled to participate but then in true Cannon fashion, created their own documentary called The Go-Go Boys: Inside Cannon Films to beat Boogaloo to the punch.  At the Cannes Film Festival in May, the two former mini-moguls held court for a screening and attendees could check out both documentaries over the festivals run.  Sadly, in August, 85 year old Golan passed away.

Captain America Two-sday

Get it?  Cause Captain America: The Winter Soldier hits home video today?  You don't get it...Amazon sent me a note about the release, looks like they patched things up with Disney as the two companies had been fighting about something so Cap wasn't available for pre-order.  I used to be a real stickler for bonus features and it seems like every outlet has some exclusive special feature.  I remember Best Buy including an extra disk of interviews for Inglorious Basterds while Target always has exclusive content as well.  For Cap, Target is offering an additional making of with their 3D/2D Blu-Ray and Digital Copy while Amazon has the standard edition for $5 more.  Looks like I'll be taking a trip to Target during lunch...Remember when Star Trek: Into Darkness had exclusive content spread across Best Buy, Target and iTunes releases?  Yeah, pretty bullshit if you ask me.

Anyways, Winter Soldier ended it's theatrical run with a spectacular $260 million take in the U.S. and over $700 million worldwide.  Marvel announced they would release part III on May 6th, 2016 which put it head to head with DC's Batman VS Superman/Justice League movie primer.  DC finally relented and moved giving Cap the lucrative first weekend of summer to himself.  After Winter Soldier's well executed if not wholly groundbreaking story of a political thriller with comic book heroes, rumors are swirling that the third installment will continue in the same vein with returning directors Joe and Anthony Russo.  The guys at Marvel are the smartest dudes in the room right now so I hope they'll remember how Iron Man II turned out when they just gave audiences more of what they liked in the original, i.e. their worst film to date that.  I always refer to it as Iron Man 1.5 since nothing new in terms of scope, storytelling or tone was really introduced.  At the time Marvel was still chasing DC's unexpected success of Batman Begins and The Dark Knight.  While BB was like a ninja movie meets detective story, it's sequel was more or less a serious, character driven take on Heat, the classic 90's Al Pacino and Robert DeNiro flick about professional cops and thieves.  The sequel was bigger, darker, more detailed and dramatic.  Meanwhile, Iron Man II gave us nothing new stylistically and again pitted Shellhead against a variation of himself, this time with sparkly whips and some drones to destroy, yawn...

With SHIELD more or less destroyed in part II, here's hoping that Cap III doesn't get stuck being the vessel for the further adventures of a bunch of random ass characters and TV show.  Sure Nick Fury, Black Widow and The Falcon all fit in quite nicely but you don't see Thor or Iron Man having to share their movies with so many other characters.

Shot on the streets in my home state of Ohio's Cleveland, I got kind of giddy in the theater when I thought Fury's car was actually going to take off like it does in the comics...

Summer Cinema Shootout: June

It's been a pretty mild summer weather wise up until these past couple of weeks so going to the movies is always a good way to get out of the heat.  Star Trek Into Darkness, World War Z and This Is The End popped back into theaters to wring that last bit of cash out of summer movie goers.  I saw two of those back in June which was far from filled with gloom, movie wise.  Instead we got superheroes, buddy action flicks and end of the world scenarios via Rapture and Zombies.

Man Of Steel:  Surprisingly enjoyable, action and spectacle overload. Russell Crowe and Kevin Costner as my two dads was a nice touch but their extended screen time just shows you how boring Superman is on his own.

This Is The End:  Really funny, great cast and one of the greatest endings of the year.  Michael Cera's coked out version of himself was his best performance probably ever.  Was waiting for someone to go full JCVD and do a monologue to camera.

World War Z:  Solid, quasi-realistic, globe hopping, epidemic evading, adult entertainment thriller.  The quiet, reworked last act was a welcome change from the explosions and destruction we got with Iron Man Three, Star Trek and Superman.

White House Down:  Like an 80's buddy movie with cheese, excitement and jokes.  Has several moments that are uber ridiculous that you're sure the filmmakers are aware of but do it anyway.  I mean the President fires a grenade launcher out of the back of a SUV, what do you want?

The Heat:  The buddy movie that could, funny and purposely cringe worthy on multiple occasions.  Nice to see Biff back on the big screen as well, butthead!

Much Ado About Nothing:  Once you get used to the Shakespeare lingo, it's good times with lots of laughs and that kid from Gladiator all growed up but looking virtually the same.

June Champion:  A tie between This Is The End and World War Z.

Couldn't find the JCVD scene in English so settle for this:

Track Star: Rod Stewart

After seeing Star Trek Into Darkness again, I had a hankering for some Peter Weller action.  Luckily he guest starred as another war mongering villain in the Star Trek universe on two 2005 episodes of Enterprise.  Over the years I've caught a few episodes of the original series, more than a few of Next Generation, a couple Voyager but not one of Deep Space Nine or Enterprise.  Imagine my surprise when the theme song was a cover of Faith of the Heart by my favorite English crooner, Rod Stewart! 



The credits list the song written by one Diane Warren who I found out is one of the world's foremost writer of songs having had her tunes belted out by the likes of Aerosmith, Stewart, Elton John, Barbara Streisand, Roy Orbison, N'Sync, Celine Dion and Canadian crooner Bryan Adams.  Warren and Stewart's collaboration was produced for Robin Williams' 1998 "medical student uses humor on patients" effort Patch Adams.  Didn't that movie end in a really messed up way?  Like his best friend or love interest got murdered messed up?

Three years later, Russell Watson would cover and rework Faith of the Heart, now dubbed Where My Heart Will Take Me for Enterprise, making it the first vocal track used for a Trek theme song.  Apparently the ol' Trek fanbase didn't love the song and petitioned for it's removal.  Producers stood firm and kept the track for the shows four years.  I can't say Watson's rendition beats the original because let's face it, who can really beat Rod the Mod, Rod the Bod when it comes to sweeping performances that get to you on multiple levels?  Soothing, uplifting, nearly inspiring...what?  I've got Tiger Blood bro, bring it!



Close your eyes and listen, tell me you don't have visions of clouds, sailing and winning:

Summer Cinema Shootout: May

It's Labor Day!  You know, the "yearly national tribute to the contributions workers have made to the strength, prosperity, and well-being of our country". Hopefully you're doing something relaxing or fun, unless you work in the service industry and are getting some nice Over Time.

Labor Day marks the end of the summer cinema season, not just big, special effects filled blockbusters but outdoor screenings in the grass as well.  If this summer's films taught us anything, it's that 1)  Hollywood crams too many movies into a short time and 2)  Audiences can only take so many big spectacle action films.


Thanks to surprise hits like 1998's Deep Impact, 1999's The Mummy and 2000's Gladiator, early May has officially become the start of the summer movie season.  It's great to be first before viewer fatigue sets in as Marvel learned since they've slotted Iron Man Two, Thor and The Avengers there, essentially getting while the getting is good.  This year my May consisted of:

Iron Man Three:  Great way to start the summer.  Fun and surprisingly funny.  Ben Kingsley's Mandarin was superb even if Guy Pearce's Mortal Kombat-esque villain, Gwentyh Paltrow's presence and inherent subsequent annoying media quotes and too many damn Iron Man suits flying around make you wonder where they can really take the franchise from here.

The Iceman:  Not exactly a summer blockbuster but a nice change of pace.  Small, character driven, well cast and executed.  Michael Shannon's killer warm up before going full out for Man of Steel.

Star Trek Into Darkness:  The summer's best use of Peter Weller.  Exciting and funny but with some real high peaks and really low valleys.  Still talking with Trek purists about their loathe for the film but hey, they tried to get Benecio Del Toro to play Khan!  Not sure if J.J. Abrams told Karl Urban to go complete Deforest Kelley... "Are you out of your corn fed mind?!"

Fast & Furious 6:  Good times with car chases, destruction and fights.  A couple truly "What The Fuck but I'm going with it" moments to keep you paying attention.  Diesel and company need to learn from Arnold that the hero shouldn't be noticeably bigger than the villain because when hero wins it's not exciting.  The Rock has become a caricature of himself though and not in a good way.  Well, he was great in Pain & Gain...

The Hangover Part III:  Got a little dark, got a little who gives a shit...I'd rather watch Old School.

May Champion:  Close fight between Iron Man Three and Star Trek Into Darkness.

Great clip of Peter Weller talking about how he got involved with Trek:

24 Hours: Tango & Cash (24th and 3rd) Anniversary

Movies.  Anniversaries.  Movie anniversaries.  Movies as anniversaries.  That's how this crazy weekend got started.  A weekend that would include 5 movies at 3 venues in 24 hours.

12:01 AM, Saturday, 5.18...

You see, three years ago a local Los Angeles theater played a Sylvester Stallone triple feature of Cobra, Tango & Cash and Cliffhanger.  Randomly, I met a fellow Stallone fan and her friend at the event.  Cut to today, we're all still seeing movies together and celebrated our anniversary at a midnight screening of 1989's Tango & Cash at The Cinefamily's Heavy Hitter Midnites series.

Who programs movies like this?  Why, the same action movie connoisseur who programmed it three years ago!  He's a huge fan of action movies and absolutely loves Tango & Cash in a passionate, non-ironic way.  Which is the best way to love anything because it's real.  I actually overheard some clowns (at another theater) talking about paying to see Star Trek Into Darkness just so they could rip it apart ((This is why people still make fun of genre and pop culture fans because some of them are self haters.) You know what's really cool?  Being cool with yourself.)

Apparently, Warner Brothers does not have a copy of T&C in their vault so tonight's 35mm print was provided by a private collector within The Academy Film Archive.  Surprisingly there were at least a dozen members in the audience who had never seen the flick before.  Get ready for a surprise!

If you haven't seen this movie by now, I'm not going to try to convince you to.  Just know that it's awesome and ridiculous at the same time.  It concerns two of Los Angeles' top cops, Detective Ray "Armani with a badge" Tango and Gabriel "eats burritos and wears boots that fire bullets" Cash played by messrs Sylvester Stallone and Kurt Russell.  They're set up by a powerful crime syndicate headed by mice lover/sniffer Jack Palance (You.  Are.  My number one...Guy!) and James Hong (Lo-Pan!).  The duo have to escape a corrupt prison, fight the clock and blow up a warehouse to clear their names.  Hilarious, homo erotic, big haired, cross dressing, car chasing, back seat humping, gun shooting, fist fighting, RV from Hell-ing, 80's synth-scored hijinks ensues.

I forgot how many familiar faces line the cast.  Beyond Stallone, Russell, Palance and Hong you get pre-Lois and Clark Teri Hatcher, Brion James (Steel Dawn), Geoffrey Lewis (Double Impact, JCVD as twins alert!), Philip Tan (Surf Ninjas), Michael J. Pollard (I Come In Peace), Edward Bunker (cameos in Best of the Best I & II), Michael Jeter (The Green Mile) and the Face himself, Robert Z'Dar!

The chemistry between Stallone and Russell is great and they both look like they're having a good time between the constant ribbing and unrelenting action.  Stallone wasn't bromantic with Arnold yet so there's a few zingers tossed at the Austrian Oak.

It would be interesting to hear some of the stories behind this weirdly funny action movie as credited director Andrei Konchalavskiy was replaced towards the end of production by Albert Magnoli (Nash Bridges!) as the producers didn't like the serious tone he was going for.  It's said that Patrick Swayze was originally set to play Cash but dropped out to headline 80's "philosophical karate bouncer" classic Road House.  Stallone had original Director of Photography Barry Sonnenfeld fired because he wasn't being lit to satisfaction.  The budget swelled as production problems arose and is said to have hit $55 million.

Nevertheless, the movie ended up being a Top 20 grosser in 1989, Russell's biggest hit behind Backdraft and Stargate and a top 10 for Stallone.

It was a fun night and start to my crazy Saturday.  So how about that sequel?

Until then, check out some of the best programming in Los Angeles (Van Damme Triple Feature, come on!) at http://www.cinefamily.org/films/heavy-hitter-midnites/

Check out this great "bad cop, worse cop" bit: