Summer Cinema: Wonder Woman

We checked out DC's latest flick, Wonder Woman, on opening Thursday a couple of weeks ago. Decades in the making, Gal Gadot's Wonder Woman was a highlight of the uneven Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice and will have a key role in the upcoming ensemble Justice League. And compared to Man of Steel, BvS and Suicide Squad, Wonder Woman is the most effective, even tempered and exciting film yet for DC's burgeoning cinematic universe. We start off on an island of female Amazonians that is separate from the world we live in and meet young princess Diana. Her mother Hippolyta (Connie Nielsen) objects to Diana becoming a warrior but soon daughter defies mother and trains with her aunt, the greatest warrior on the island, Antiope (Robin Wright). In her teens, Diana discovers that she has the latent powers of a god, thanks to her absentee father Zeus. Soon, the sins of man invade their peaceful existence when pilot Steve Trevor (Chris Pine) crosses the dimensional threshold along with a pack of pursuing Germans from the Great War happening next door. Diana travels to the world of men to find and kill Ares, the god of war that Diana believes has infected mankind. A sweet yet dramatic fish out of water story ensues as Diana joins Steve as he heads to the front to face the evil Ludendorff and Dr. Maru.

Going in with no real expectations, the Patty Jenkins directed, Allan Heinberg, Zack Snyder and Jason Fuchs scripted Wonder Woman was an excellent time at the movies. A nice mix of fantasy, action and war film with some terrific production values, a great cast and well done action sequences with all the slow motion jump spinning you can shake a sword at. The film does remind you of other things though, with the beach locales and armored warriors at the start evoking a bit of Troy, then getting Captain America with the war setting and some men on a mission, Sgt. Rock vibes from the ragtag crew Steve rounds up to go on their mission. The film is doing gangbusters, having already grossed over $435 million worldwide in two weeks with one of the smallest week to week drops at the U.S. box office for the genre. The success is well deserved for such a wholly satisfying flick, bring on the sequel!

Summer Cinema: The Legend of Tarzan

In a summer of sequel-itis and many titles lacking that "must see" factor, The Legend of Tarzan was not very high on my list. I haven't seen much of Alexander Skarsgard's work and the first trailer was beyond meh with CGI apes and blah blah blah. But I'm a fan of author Edgar Rice Burroughs, Skarsgard's late show promotional appearances have been endearing and word of mouth has been surprisingly positive. So on Saturday night we took in a 3D Extreme Digital screening next door along with a few adult beverages. The film puts Skarsgard's John Clayton/Tarzan in aristocratic England ten years after after leaving the jungle, being invited back to the Congo for some political, promotional something or other. Along for the ride is American southerner George Washington Williams (a scene stealing Samuel L. Jackson), Margot Robbie as the not quite helpless damsel in distress Jane, Christolph Waltz is the baddie Leon Rom while Djimon Hounsou pops up as Chief Mbonga.

Overall, I quite enjoyed The Legend of Tarzan as a big adventure flick with a surprising amount of humor and excellent chemistry between Skarsgard and Jackson. Jackson has the best and most random line of the film when he describes the trek to the Congo as being a guaranteed political and personal home run as "ham sandwich, easily". Add that one to the ol' Dammaged Goods response library...The CGI is obvious but somehow works as elements are put together in layers versus just watching a hyper and shiny video game. The apes don't look too shabby and sequences running on branches and swinging from vines are exciting. There's a sense of The Mummy in the flick, as in being an old fashioned and enjoyable adventure tale with decent amounts of character depth juxtaposed with big action sequences where animals charge, boats sink and the like. Skarsgard is solid as the brooding Englishman who strips off his shirt to rekindle the inner beast when his beloved Jane is put in danger. Robbie infuses her performance with warmth and spunk while looking like a new age Jamie Pressley.

The allegedly $180 million movie has been in development for some time but I feel the advertising campaign from Warner Brothers left a lot to be desired. I can't recall seeing much for the film before the first trailer and opening weekend was tracking for a soft $30 some million opening. Luckily the picture received an A- CinemaScore and is over performing, taking in $45 million for the holiday weekend. I don't think this will warrant a sequel but I'm glad the film found an audience and will probably do well overseas. Skarsgard put in 9 months of eating and training to be Tarzan ready and while watching I thought he'd make an excellent He-Man in the film that will never get made.

Summer Cinema: Independence Day Resurgence

Last Friday night we checked out Cinemark's Reserve Seating, where you sit in the top of the theater with reclining seats along with food and drink service. Or their version of AMC Dine-In or say Alamo Drafthouse. Unlike those other brands, at Cinemark, they want your orders in and done by the time the film starts which means no in-film refreshment refills. While the idea of eating and dranking during a flick seems like a solid notion, the execution across the board at any establishment has not been perfected. AMC's is awkward as you're paying the check during the film and there's no easy way to have your Stubs membership updated in the dark. But their menu is pretty big and food tasty enough with decent lighting so you can see what you're doing and still be in a movie. Alamo is a little more low tech in the sense of you write down what you want and a person runs by and picks it up. Cinemark was probably the worst of these dine-in experiences because it was so freaking dark it was difficult to eat/drink.

Anyways, 20 years later, Independence Day: Resurgence comes to us from original creators Roland Emmerich and Dean Devlin. After making their Hollywood splash with Carolco's Universal Soldier starring our guys Jean-Claude Van Damme and Dolph Lundgren, the duo would go on to bigger budgets and successes with 1994's Stargate and 96's mammoth hit Independence Day where Will Smith, Jeff Goldblum, Bill Pullman and crew defeated an alien invasion. Two decades on the film drops us into the new world of alien fused technology where man works on the moon and there's flying vehicles galore. With Will Smith not returning we get a trio of new young characters played by the likes of Liam Hemsworth, Jessie T. Usher and Maika Monroe are faced with a new invasion threat, bigger and badder than the last. Alas the writing and their improv skills are no match for Will Smith's original charm or chemistry with Jeff Goldblum.

Visually interesting and a little too fast paced for it's own good, Emmerich and Devlin blend the light disaster flick ensemble with all out sci-fi warfare. While the first relished in practical f/x composited with computer images, Resurgence looks great when it's on set and indoors but horrible when the action moves outside and everything is CGI. I also can't stand the fact that films no longer shoot outside. Whether it's ID4:R or Captain America: Civil War, it's glaringly obvious outdoor scenes are shot on greenscreen. It's nice to see Pullman back in the mix as the scarred former President but Brent Spiner's Dr. Okun, a kooky highlight of the first film, is near annoying comic relief this time out. The end is pretty open and indicates intergalactic war, so hey, sign me up for third. Resurgence isn't a great film but it has it's moments. Less fun than this summer's X-Men: Apocalypse but way more enjoyable and less frustrating than Warcraft. After a ho-hum $41 million opening weekend, the $165 million flick made up ground overseas and is nearing $200 million globally so only time will tell if we get that part 3.

Summer Cinema: Warcraft

This past Thursday we went into Warcraft with no real expectations. I'd played the original game and part 2 as a youth, dabbled in part 3 but never checked out online giant World of Warcraft. Directed by Duncan Jones with a co-writing assist from Charles Leavitt and Chris Metzen, the first trailers did not look good. Just your typical bad CGI with live action mash up. But hey, I'm a sucker for large scale, fantasy world set, sword swinging action flicks like Lord of the Rings, Willow, Dragonheart, Clash of the Titans, Conan the Barbarian, Masters of the Universe and the recent Gods of Egypt. Sadly, even with no expectations, Warcraft failed to deliver. It just wasn't very exciting or compelling. I felt so bad for my lady that halfway through the film I ran out to get her another glass of wine so she wouldn't be too bored. And I was several whiskey gingers in yet still not enjoying the flick.

We're thrown into a world of orcs, knights, mages and griffins with magic portals, ornate armor and lightning spells. But no real set up so like Hunger Games, I didn't get transported in or believe what I was seeing. The humans feel threatened by the orcs, the orcs are just trying to save their clan, there's some family and character moments but most of it falls flat. As Jones and crew fail to set up the alternate world, they also try to ground it in reality with all the character bits but end of the day you don't care about anyone in the film or if they live or die. Add to that the fact everything looks fake, from the CGI orcs next to a green painted Paula Patton to the well designed yet still manufactured looking armor and false looking sets, there's just nothing to grasp to. There's swords, war hammers and axes galore but not a single duel if I recall correctly. Lots of implied violence and cutting to black but no sword clashing or choreography. Battle scenes come off as a lot of frantic activity with no actual fighting. I just don't get it.

Budgeted at an estimated $160 million, Warcraft was supposedly aimed at the Chinese audience which has eaten the film up, breaking records and grossing a shattering $140+ million in only a few days. Yet there's one Asian character in the film and he doesn't have a line. Although American born Daniel Wu is a performance capture villain. Opening in the states this weekend, Warcraft grossed a not great $24 million amidst poor reviews and will struggle to hit $75 million I'm guessing. My hopes for a Pacific Rim or Edge of Tomorrow surprise were certainly dashed and I can't imagine any amount of foreign box office will greenlight a WC sequel any time soon. Look at Terminator: Genisys, it didn't hit $100 million in America but ended up grossing $440 million globally with so-so word of mouth, prompting Paramount to promptly pump the brakes on two proposed sequels. Leaving the film I felt weirdly frustrated, this is the kind of movie I should like and I was hoping it would succeed as the underdog but as it stands, Warcraft is the worst and most disappointing movie I've seen this summer if not the year. Oh, plus there was no Leeroy Jenkins reference...

Summer Cinema: X-Men Apocalypse

The summer cinematic superhero season continues as X-Men: Apocalypse is poised to pass $200 million worldwide by the end of the long Memorial Day weekend. It's been an interesting road for the genetically mutated and wondrously powered X-Men after Fox bought the screen rights from Carolco's bankruptcy and placed Bryan Singer at the helm with Wolverine at the forefront. 2000's X-Men was the first of it's kind and with Spider-Man, ushered in the big budget comic book era we currently live in. Back then comic book movies were still wildly uneven and X-Men was given a decent if unspectacular $75 million budget and a mid-level cast of familiar faces and strong actors if not box office stars like Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellan and Halle Berry. Production was stopped twice and it's July box office success was a bit of a shock. Afraid to truly embrace the comic book nature of bright costumes and whiz bang action, X-Men tries to ground things in reality, makes being a mutant akin to being a suppressed homosexual or tortured prisoner of war and the costumes are very The Matrix-esque with black leather replacing blue and yellow tights.

Fox has always chased the stars as X2 put Halle Berry's Storm up front after the actress won an Oscar. The same happened after Jennifer Lawrence went supernova in The Hunger Games and all of a sudden the shape shifting henchman Mystique was now a lead character. Minor character Gambit, played by Taylor Kitsch in Origins: Wolverine was now going to be a standalone film starring Channing Tatum, hot off of Magic Mike and 21 Jump Street but after diminishing returns on Jupiter Ascending and Magic Mike 2, the project has seemingly gone quiet. While X2 became a standard of quality in the genre, X-Men 3 suffered from a troubled production which saw Bryan Singer jump ship to DC and Warner Brothers for the ill fated Superman Returns, replacement Matthew Vaughn left shortly before production was to begin and Brett Ratner was brought in last minute, smashed two scripts together and became the franchises' whipping boy even though his effort is totally watchable and leaps and bounds better than Origins: Wolverine.

First Class breathed new life into the franchise by taking the action back to the 60's but the film grossed less than the four films that preceded it. Fox made the wise move of blending the original X-Men trilogy with the new cast while more or less rebooting the series with Days of Future Past and grossed a franchise high $747 million bucks. Then the long gestating Deadpool turned the genre on it's head with a modestly budgeted, foul mouthed and violent R-rated juggernaut to become the highest grossing film in the series. Now comes X-Men: Apocalypse where our heroes and villains battle a powerful mutant from Egyptian times. We're reintroduced to the likes of optic blasting Scott Summers aka Cyclops, super telekinetic Jean Grey and the blue skinned teleporter Nightcrawler who are now youngsters in the 80's. Sitting in the darkened theater I was surprised how much I enjoyed the film. No X-flick has truly been great but after 16 years, it seemed like they were finally embracing the comic books and Apocalypse was the X-Men'iest film to date. While some might be frustrated at the shoe horned number of characters in the film, they're all given their five minutes, even if that means no one gets to stand out or really shine. I just had fun watching so many characters, many in costume, flying and jumping and running and fighting while using their powers in a world that was finally simply presented instead of explained.

Sure you could nitpick about lack of character development or epic-ness and questionable CGI but overall I had an excellent time and would see it again. Though for a film set in the 80's there's a distinct lack of neon, synth, Dazzler and awesomely 80's as hell Longshot, the dude with spiky blonde hair, a mullet and a black leather outfit. On an even more personal level, I was just happy to see Cyclops not be the bitch of the series like James Marsden's version was in the past. I laughed out loud when we got a glimpse of his 90's style outfit where straps, pouches and shoulder pads were all the rage. Franchise fatigue has definitely set in for the X-Men as reviews have not been kind and box office grosses coming in lower than projected. Contracts for stars James McAvoy, Michael Fassbender and Jennifer Lawrence are all fulfilled. Fox is already focusing on a Deadpool sequel, X-Force and The New Mutants but young Cyke, Jean and Nightcrawler Tye Sheridan, Sophie Turner and Kodi Smit-McPhee are all signed on for at least two more films. The stage is set for a kinetic and action packed, more contained story set in the 90's so here's hoping we get it.

Summer Cinema: Captain America Civil War

This is a little late but remember when I told you I've been busy?! Of course we kicked off the summer cinema season with a Thursday, May 4th screening of Captain America: Civil War at The Arclight Hollywood in laser 3D. We followed it up with a 2D screening at The Chinese Theatre's luxurious but still not real sized IMAX that Saturday. My original consensus was that Civil War was a terrific Marvel film with excellent action, lots of characters, cameos and funny bits. But it wasn't a terrific Captain America film as it's diluted by the inclusion of Iron Man and needing to introduce Black Panther and Spider-Man to the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Plus it's misnamed as there's more Avengers in this Captain America film than there were in the actual Avengers movies. As a Captain America fan, I've long been annoyed by Cap's use as the MCU placeholder. First Avenger was an excellent, rock'em, sock'em throwback with it's World War II setting and sci-fi tinged sensibility that set up The Avengers. While The Winter Soldier was more or less the SHIELD movie as it ended the arc of the secret organization. Then Civil War caps off The Avengers phase by breaking them up while launching two other franchises. Meanwhile, Thor and Iron Man have gotten their own movies without having to keep viewers informed of what's happening in all things Marvel land.

Upon second viewing I did appreciate the Captain America dynamic a bit more as the material with Cap, Falcon and Bucky is all solid, Cap gets to stand tall for what he believes and smooches his lovely former neighbor Sharon. You can forgive the Marvel-ness of the affair, the Giant-Man cameo was awesome, I still just wish they'd believe in Cap and give him a standalone movie. It was a little weird that Cap has now become Superman, being able to survive any fall or beating, can stop a helicopter from taking off and take punches from Spider-Man. Pretty impressive for a guy who's basically supposed to be an Olympian who doesn't get tired. But with all this interconnected blah blah blah for better or for worse, that's just not going to happen. Can you imagine if Zemo was actually Baron Zemo with ties to Cap from WWII? Instead of having a flashback sequence with Bucky performing a hit, it could have set up Cap and Zemo's feud from the 40's then cut to today, they're both back. Whether it's the original Zemo or his kid like in the comics. You then have Falcon and Cap looking for Bucky and the three teaming up to try and stop and eventually face off with Zemo's sleeping super soldiers. Could be a fantastic Captain America movie that's two hours instead of a pseudo Avengers flick that runs two and a half and is 40% Tony Stark/Iron Man.

With each Marvel star's long term contracts coming to an end, I wonder if Chris Evans will reenlist or take a break. He doesn't seem to be starving for work, given that he's only done what, Snowpiercer and directorial effort Before We Go in between Marvel films. Always in shape but if you notice, Evans is shirtless in part I, in a tank top in II and dons a tight tee shirt in III so maybe he's getting tired of the workout routine as well. While Chris Hemsworth has fallen flat as a leading man in Rush, Blackhat, In the Heart of the Sea, The Huntsman and definitely needs his Thor alter ego to keep his career going. As well as appear shirtless in about every film appearance and may be on his way to Zac Efron territory who can't find work without working out. It's no secret that Robert Downey, Jr. has made a mint from Marvel and has stated more than once that Iron Man 4 is not a priority. But a Tony Stark cameo in the rebooted Spider-Man is rumored while Civil War sets Cap up to appear in Black Panther while they could both return for the two part Avengers: Infinity War so we'll just have to wait and see.

Summer Cinema: A Walk In the Woods

This past weekend marked the end of the Summer Movie Season as Labor Day is generally pretty quiet at the box office. Newcomers The Transporter Refueled and A Walk in the Woods were no match for faith based holdover War Room. Woods stars Robert Redford and Nick Nolte as old writing buddies and hell raisers as Redford's aging, semi-retired author Bill Bryson decides to hike the Appalachian Trail to see America after living abroad for a couple of decades. The trailers made the film out to be a coming of old age, heart warming, odd couple style adventure comedy and it didn't disappoint. It's not great and there's no career defining performance from either actor but it's a fun flick that makes you want to hit the road, see some nature, meet strangers and eat some deliciously heavy food.

Bill Bryson (Redford) is living a nice life in suburbia with his loving wife Catherine (Emma Thompson, who I thought was his daughter at first, whoops). Having only written forewords and overseen re-released past works for years, Bryson is getting a little bored and one day sees a sign for the Appalachian Trail while on a walk. Feeling like he needs to see more of his own country, Bryson decides to devote six months to becoming one with nature but Catherine is afraid he'll be eaten by a bear or get lost and die out in the woods. Wanting him to find a hiking buddy, Bryson reaches out to old friends who think he's crazy until one night, a grizzled voice from his past calls up, wanting to join. Said grizzled voice belongs to Stephen Katz (Nick Nolte), a woman chasing, booze swilling son of a gun that Bryson knew in his younger days. The two haven't spoken in decades and Katz still owes him $600 bucks. Katz shows up looking like he's on his last leg, for real, Nolte is perennially red faced and seemingly struggling for breath, overweight, limping and has some wild hair. Either this is some real good acting or art simply imitating life. The duo hit the trail and encounter a slew of fellow hikers and small town folk played by a litany of familiar faces including Nick Offerman, Kristen Schaal and Mary Steenburgen.

Of course the two discuss life and love, missed opportunities, who they were, who they are and the like while enduring heat, rain and snow while surviving treacherous trails, falls and maybe a bear or two. I wasn't quite sure where the film was going because they weren't going to reach the end of the trail at the pace the flick was moving and I wasn't sure if it was gonna get real by killing off one of them. There's justifiably long sequences of beautiful landscapes set to soothing music and by the end, there's a touch of being at peace with oneself not being justified by accomplishments or titles. There's a quick photo of both leading men in their primes and hot Damme, was Redford a handsome devil. Still dignified if a little frail, Woods was easier to watch than the overrated All Is Lost while Nolte couldn't top his excellent performance from Warrior. Director Ken Kwapis directs from a script by Rick Kerb, Bill Holderman and Bill Bryson that was originally meant to be a third vehicle for Reford and Paul Newman after mega-hits Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid and The Sting. Sadly, the project languished since being optioned in 1998, Newman's health declined and the actor, race car driver and philanthropist died in 2008. Only a few years younger than Redford, Nick Nolte was then lined up to co-star. To date, A Walk in the Woods has grossed a not shabby $13 million bucks in it's first week. Not bad for a surprisingly tame R rated (Nolte's potty mouth) flick starring two 70 something year olds. Zach Efron would kill for those numbers.

Summer Cinema: No Escape

What a weird Thursday, planned on walking over to the Runway for happy hour and dinner but Jefferson was closed down. I couldn't figure out what was happening, Google had nothing then Twitter told me that there was a bomb threat at the Whole Foods! Mind you, I live in the heart of the Silicon Beach area where many a tech giant has planted stakes like IMAX, Konami, YouTube, Belkin, etc but in the last months there's been a shooting next door, human feces outside my building and now this. Apparently it was a mysterious black gym bag with an electric meter sitting in the parking structure. It was exploded with C4 but ended up not being a bomb, I'm guessing it was forgotten equipment from one of the construction crew...

With all showtimes canceled at the Cinemark Playa Vista, we headed to Culver City for some Happy Hour action at Rush Street before taking in No Escape at the Arclight. After a couple of blackberry and bourbon dranks, it was time to check out Owen Wilson in his first action-centric role since 2001's Behind Enemy Lines. The trailers accentuated one ridiculous scene where Wilson's on the run father throws his young daughters through the air from one roof to another in slow motion. Instead of being a derivative Taken knock off and trying to turn Wilson into an action hero, No Escape proved to be a solid thriller with some intense and harrowing moments along with a memorable performance from former James Bond Pierce Brosnan.

Shot in Thailand, No Escape finds out of work engineer Jack Dwyer (Wilson), wife Annie (Lake Bell) and their two daughters beginning anew in an I believe unnamed Asian country where Jack has been brought in to work on a local water project. In a new world where they don't speak the language, know the customs and unable to read the signs, they're befriended by the charming yet smarmy Hammond (Pierce Brosnan). All staying at the same posh hotel in town, things go bad real fast when a local coup sees a rebellion killing the local monarch and Americans are targeted for termination due to their intruding and political enslaving agenda. Jack and family go on the run, seeking safety and shelter; hiding at the American Embassy, in office buildings and on the streets. With lives on the line, Jack protects his family as best he can and resorts to brutal violence to do so. Hammond and his Kenny Rogers loving buddy (Sahajak Boonthanakit) turn out to be former military types lapping up women and booze and help Jack's family form a plan to reach Vietnam where they can be granted asylum.

With many kids back in school, the summer cinema season winds down as No Escape looks to gross a middling $12 million through the weekend while Zac Efron's EDM coming of age story We Are Your Friends got trounced in Thursday night previews by faith flick War Room. Written, produced and directed by brothers John and Drew Dowdle, No Escape is pretty raw and brutal while keeping tensions high throughout for the most part. Slow motion is a little overdone and the scene with the kid throwing elicited a laugh from me as it was ridiculous yet terrifying at the same time. It reminded me of John Wick in a sense as both had some hardcore R rated violence yet aimed to provide some heart via a dead spouses dog and in this case, a family trying to survive. No Escape isn't nearly as moody or stylish as Wick though. The locals aren't made out to be complete savages a la Rambo's Burmese soldiers and the ex-pats are firmly blamed for the current conditions. Wilson and Bell are excellent as the struggling parents who are forced to turn to violence with the film not trying to turn Wilson into a Jason Bourne style action star like From Paris With Love, The Gunman or Edge of Darkness tried to do in the Taken's wake. Brosnan is a highlight as the crude yet cool and mysterious, "something like that" English Intelligence guy who knows the score and how to shoot.

Summer Cinema: The Man From U.N.C.L.E.

We've been over to the new Cinemark in Playa Vista several times for dranks and a show but had yet to taste the food. It was a quiet night in their upstairs bar and restaurant with more employees around than patrons. I guess that's a true sign that not much is coming out this weekend huh? We chowed down on their edamame (not great, not horrible), mac n' cheese (excellent) and burger (too much mustard but good fries) with a few whiskey & ginger beers. It feels like it's been a while since we saw a new movie so tonight it was Warner Brothers' update of 1960's spy show, The Man From U.N.C.L.E. starring Superman Henry Cavill and Lone Ranger Armie Hammer. Snatch and Sherlock Holmes helmer Guy Ritchie co-wrote the script along with Lionel Wigram, Jeff Kleeman and David C. Wilson based on Sam Rolfe's original work on the television series.

Set in the early 1960's, handsome and suave crook turned CIA operative Napoleon Solo (Cavill) is sent to find a missing rocket scientist turned bomb maker by recruiting his car mechanic daughter Gaby (Alicia Vikander, reminiscent of a young Carla Gugino). Only trouble is, Russian strongman agent with a temper Ilya (Hammer) has been given the same assignment. The U.S. and Russia deem a team up necessary and the odd coupled trio are sent off, facing underground Nazi villains. I never saw the show and had no expectations of what to expect. From the trailers I figured on a stylish, snazzy and exciting time shot on digital video. There's style and panache in droves here with clothes, cars and settings while Cavill and Hammer both do fine with one being a smooth talker while the other a volcano ready to erupt. There's a few funny bits in the film as we see what's going on behind our characters, usually including something exploding or being set on fire.

Ritchie, the man behind such great flicks as Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels, Snatch, Revolver and RocknRolla crafts an Ocean's 11 meets a Quentin Tarantino spy film with big music and huge block yellow subtitles that has some memorable parts but doesn't quite equal a whole. I knew the film was under 2 hours but checked my phone (discreetly and with brightness low, of course) a couple times to see where we were because the pace just kind of languished. While his early, low budget work sparked with energy, visual stimulus and terrific casts, his big budget fare just doesn't keep my interest as well. I found Sherlock Holmes to be a bit of a CGI snoozefest and the digital work in U.N.C.L.E. wasn't amazing either. Any scene involving fast movement, especially at night, looked terrible in digital. I know that Ritchie is a big martial arts fan and practitioner so it was disappointing not to see one complex or choreographed hand to hand fight scene. Much of the action is implied and takes place off screen while we're left with one bathroom knockaround, a montage invasion sequence and boats chasing each other, etc.

I never saw the original TV show but knew it starred John Sturges alumni Robert Vaughn (The Magnificent Seven) and David McCallum (The Great Escape). Sadly no appearance from either. Semi-retired Prime Minster of English Awesomeness Hugh Grant shows up in a small role looking very much his 54 years. About a Boy was great though, wasn't it? Costing an estimated $80 million bucks, U.N.C.L.E. opened to a disappointing $13 million this past weekend, getting crushed by N.W.A. biopic Straight Outta Compton. The project had been in development at Warner Brothers for a decade, almost being made with George Clooney starring and Steven Soderbergh directing but health issues forced the star to decline while Soderbergh walked after story and budget issues. Looks like U.N.C.L.E. won't be following in the franchise footsteps of Mission: Impossible any time soon.

Summer Cinema: Fantastic Four

After a fun morning in Sherman Oaks, it was back to the west side for McDonald's and a nap before a late night screening of Fantastic Four. Reviews have been horrible with the film garnering a sub-10% rating on kinda BS aggregator Rotten Tomatoes but audiences also gave it a C- Cinemascore so they can't all be wrong? Or could they. The drama behind the scenes has been more compelling than the actual film it seems as young writer-director Josh Trank biting the hands that feeds him with a Tweet declaring he had a better version of the film than what was being released. Throw in some awkward PR interviews and what was once an estimated $40 million dollar opening was falling into the mid-$20's. By Sunday, the reported $120 million dollar reboot had grossed $26 million bucks, losing out to the already released Mission Impossible: Rogue Nation and scoring the lowest Marvel based opening in years. Fans cried victory, rejoicing in the failure as proof that studios shouldn't meddle with the source material.

So was Fantastic Four as bad as people were making it out to be? Was it truly some unwatchable train wreck? Honestly, no, it was not. It's not great but it's totally watchable and has some pretty interesting things going on along with a terrific score and some nice production design. The story starts in 2007 where we meet young inventor Reed Richards who has built a teleportation device out of junk. He befriends classmate Ben Grimm at the local salvage yard and the two grow up to be best pals (Miles Teller & Jaimie Bell) who develop a gate that transports physical matter across space. To where, we don't know. In steps Dr. Franklin Storm (Reg E. Cathey) who along with adopted daughter Sue (Kate Mara) are working on their own teleportation device and think Reed has cracked the riddle. Recruiting the brilliant but non-team player Victor Von Doom (Toby Kebbell) and estranged son who can build stuff Johnny (Michael B. Jordan), a trans-dimensional portal is created. But when government stiff Dr. Allen (Tim Blake Nelson) wants to get NASA and the Army involved, Reed, Ben, Johnny and Victor decide to visit the other dimension and plant their flag before someone else gets the glory. The other dimension holds cosmic power, things go bad, they're all bathed in the other wordly goo but manage to get back to Earth where Sue gets some residual cosmic crap on her. Ben turns into rock monster The Thing, Reed gains the ability to stretch himself to impossible lengths, Sue can manipulate the light spectrum and Johnny becomes a living ball of fire while Doom spends more time in the dimension and becomes a super powered being who can blow stuff up and move things telepathically.

For the first chunk of the film, I was into it, it moves pretty quick and you can forgive some of the under written and/or cheesier aspects like Teller and Bell aging 20 years in an alleged 7, Dr. Doom's nickname and montages of computer staring, etc. The low-fi approach mixed with some big sets and pretty decent CGI in the other dimension worked well enough. Marco Beltrami's score keeps things moving and I appreciated that the story wasn't a total retread of the 2005 version like The Amazing Spider-Man was of the original Sam Raimi trilogy. In a twist, the four aren't all hunky dorey in a dysfunctional family way, they're just young people with different motivations and end goals thrown together. While it's not action packed, I was never pining for a big explosion either. There's some real randomness in the film like Teller's pubic hair looking "beard" for a scene and Dr. Doom's kinda lame metal mummy look. By the end we get a pretty tame superhero showdown with the four needing to band together and take out Doom. It's all very shallow and quick moving with some visual flourishes and a few intriguing moments like when Doom walks the lab halls destroying innocents with his new found power.

Like John Carter, Battleship or Tomorrowland where bad press and reported behind the scenes turmoil had people judging the films on what they heard versus what they saw; Fantastic Four is the latest cinematic punching bag that's getting more crap than it truly deserves. It's not a genre changing masterpiece but I'm not sure who thought it was supposed to be. It was easier to sit through than Terminator: Genysis and loads better than Fox's big budget, high profile X-Men Origins: Wolverine debacle. I say if the trailers intrigued you at all, give Fantastic Four a shot and form your own opinion.

Summer Cinema: Party's Over

It's already August, yeesh! Seems like yesterday it was May and Avengers: Age of Ultron was kicking off the Summer Cinema season and I was working the Skin Trade premiere and schmoozing at Pound of Flesh's. This weekend sees a pretty crowded line up of flicks hitting cinemas including Fox's $120 million dollar reboot of Marvel comic book franchise The Fantastic Four, low budget blast from the past reunion thriller The Gift, Aardman Animations Shaun the Sheep and Meryl Streep as an over the hill rocker in Ricki and the Flash all fighting for your movie going bucks.

Fantastic Four has been battling bad press since it's onset with the hardcore fans crying about the casting of Michael B. Jordan as The Human Torch, previously played by Chris Evans. Those same fans lambasted the 2005 and '07 attempts which I enjoyed as they were basically action-comedies about a dysfunctional family with super powers. Not everything needs to be rooted in gritty darkness like Batman or taken with such self serious emptiness as The Avengers. There were rumors about young director Josh Trank losing control on set and the online vitriol being a main reason he opted out of a standalone Star Wars feature. The approach seems more lo-tech, grunge science-fiction and made for an interesting first trailer. I'm staunchly not a supporter of new Reed Richards Miles Teller so we'll see when I see this.

A film that cost less than 1/10th of Fantastic Four but looks surprisingly more interesting is Joel Edgerton's The Gift. The King Arthur, Smokin' Aces and Warrior standout had written and directed short films in Australia and co-wrote 2014's The Rover. Here he directs, produces, writes and co-stars opposite Jason Bateman and Rebecca Hall. The trailers reminded me of 1992's Unlawful Entry, where yuppie Kurt Russell and trophy wife Madeline Stowe deal with an overzealous and creepy police officer played by one Ray Liotta. Word has been good on The Gift which sees Bateman and Hall's couple being slowly terrorized by former classmate Edgerton. Newly formed studio STX Entertainment is hoping to fill the market void on low to mid budget comedies, dramas and thrillers as the big boys focus on tentpoles, comic book adaptations and franchises.

The rest of the summer looks like slim pickings with WB's update of TV show The Man From U.N.C.L.E. starring Superman's cocked eyebrow and the Lone Ranger in Russian then Lionsgate's "stoner who's actually a spy" flick American Ultra being possible good times at the theater. Until then, see ya at round 2 of Ant-Man!

Summer Cinema: Mission:Impossible Rogue Nation

It was a lovely Monday night with an early screening of Paramount's 5th chapter in their successful spy franchise Mission:Impossible. The globe trotting espionage thrillers have dealt with classified lists, world threatening viruses, arms dealers and bombing of the Kremlin. This time out, Rogue Nation deals with The Syndicate, an anti-IMF or the Impossible Missions Force, Ethan Hunt's (Tom Cruise) gang of world saving super spies that now includes computer whiz Benji (Simon Pegg), hacker Luther (Ving Rhames) and younger agent Brandt (Jeremy Renner). Spies thought dead from all over the world have seemingly banded together to fight the authorities and governments that created them. Hunt keeps running into Ilsa (Rebecca Ferguson), a mysterious woman running in the same dangerous circles.

Written and directed by The Way of the Gun and Jack Reacher's Christopher McQuarrie with a script assist from Drew Pearce, it's unsurprising that Rogue plays things pretty straight in a surprisingly character and simple plot driven piece. While the story takes place in Vienna, London and Morroco, things are far from the slick and shiny previous chapters. The action is limited to a few giant set pieces that are more for showing off some harrowing and incredibly well executed stunts involving planes, motorcycles, cars and crashes than showing off explosions. Cruise gets to mix it up a bit in a few tactical meets near unbelievable ninja jumping fights and does more than a couple standing drop kicks. There's bits of humor sprinkled throughout and the supporting cast is terrific. Alec Baldwin shows up as a CIA official in a bit of a throwback to his role as Jack Ryan from The Hunt From Red October. Cruise is his usual dependable self, the guy doesn't give shabby performances or turn up in bad movies. Newcomer to me Ferguson was an excellent mix of beauty and strength while I was left trying to remember if Renner did any action in Ghost Protocol because he doesn't do anything physical here.

While Rogue Nation played out low key, I was a little thrown off by the poor quality of some of the digital shots looking very fuzzy, dusty and blurry. There was less action than I expected but the film keeps you interested as twists, turns and reveals are made in the slow burning summer thriller that seems more oriented for adults than teens on a Friday night. It's like the Jack Reacher version of Mission: Impossible. Now I feel like going back and rewatching the series...put on some coffee.

Summer Cinema: Jian Bing Man aka Pancake Man

Please help me welcome author and #ActionMovieBro david j. moore to Dammaged Goods as he reviews Jian Bing Man, the Chinese superhero comedy that features one Jean-Claude Van Damme in a cameo role as the villain. Translated to Pancake Man, Jian Bing has grossed an astounding $125 million dollars in China and The Middle Kingdom. It's currently playing in AMC's across America so check your local listings. Moore and I met at San Diego Comic-Con last year and have been working together since. His first book, World Gone Wild: A Survivor's Guide to Post-Apocalyptic Movies has been a hit around the world with over 800 reviews and over 60 exclusive interviews with cast and crew. Moore's next work, the action film focused The Good, The Tough & The Deadly: Action Movies & Stars 1960's - Present hits shelves this holiday season. Yours truly is featured briefly with a couple of reviews and the Carl Weathers interview. Take it away David:

Let's just get this out of the way: Despite being heavily featured in the trailers, marketing, and posters, Jean-Claude Van Damme is neither the star nor the co-star of the new Chinese megabomb known as Jian Bing Man (English translation: Pancake Man). His name is spoken once early on in the film as a teaser that he might show up at some point, and you're sitting there waiting for your favorite action star to show his face in some capacity, and in the last five minutes he at last appears to add the only star quality this hopelessly immature and lost in translation motion picture has going for it. He does the splits (why wouldn't he since that's what he was paid for?), throws a butterfly kick, gets thrown on his face by the star who's wearing a yellow cape, and in the last seconds of the film before the credits roll Van Damme gets the last line: "Iron Man didn't kick my ass!" as if that's supposed to validate The Pancake Man's awesomeness. I'm telling you, guys, I really hope Van Damme got a million bucks for this garbage because if he didn't then there's no justice.

A quick backstory of my appreciation and devotion to Van Damme's work: The first time I saw one of his films in a theater was Timecop in 1994. I've been a fan ever since, seeing all of his theatrical releases any time he's been given one. I was there for everything from Maximum Risk (twice) to Knock Off and Universal Soldier: The Return, and I've sought out every screening of his latest film at every nook and cranny festival if it was playing in a theater within a hundred mile radius. I saw JCVD in a theater, I went out of my way to go see Welcome to the Jungle, Swelter, Universal Soldier: Day of Reckoning, Dragon Eyes, Enemies Closer, Pound of Flesh, and I even went to see Kung Fu Panda 2 because he did the voice of an alligator in it. If the powers that be decide that Van Damme gets a theatrical release, I make sure I'm there no matter what. So when I found out that Jian Bing Man was getting a theatrical release - playing at the Puente Hills Mall AMC Theater, I made sure I was there for the preview night on Thursday at 7:00 PM before opening night. I figured I'd be the only guy in the theater (same as I was when I saw Universal Soldier: DoR, Dragon Eyes, and Enemies Closer), but I was absolutely floored when I entered the auditorium - it was packed! Almost every single seat had been taken by a crowd of young Asians (Chinese, I'm guessing educationally), and I had to find a seat in the last row in the back. After four or five trailers for exclusively Asian films, Jian Bing Man started.

The crowd went wild for this garbage, including the guy sitting next to me who kept looking over to me, wondering why I wasn't as thrilled as he was. From the first frames, the audience laughed uncontrollably, clapped, cheered, and had a great time. The guy next to me kept ribbing me, trying to get a response out of me, but it just wasn't happening. I almost wanted to run to the foot of the auditorium to take a photo of everyone in the theater having a such a good time because not only was I the only gweilo in the place, but I was also the only person not laughing. As in Chinese opera and theater, almost everything in these modern films from that region takes great pains to oversimplify drama, mystery, and comedy to the point of nullifying any sense of personal gratification for going on a cinematic journey along with characters you're supposed to care about. Silly characters are ridiculously broad, with massively broad strokes coloring their temperature when they're in comedic situations. Gay characters (forget subtlety) are parodies of gay characters, and romantic, leading characters are hopeless romantics with melodramatic subplots who are sometimes allowed long, drawn-out (and in slow motion, no less) flashbacks to childhood for no good reason. To top off all of this cinematic ineptitude, the main character (played by the film's director Da Peng, who is just cute enough to play the lead, but just nerdy enough to have everyone in the film consider him a loser) dreams of becoming a superhero known as Pancake Man, whose sole superpower is to throw raw eggs at bad guys. We get slow-mo shots of eggs crashing on grimacing faces, and Pancake Man (who sort of looks like Cyclone from He-Man and the Masters of the Universe) flips around and zooms off into the ether from whence he came. For me, this was not a superhero movie, a comedy, or a spoof of any sort. It is a sad and confounding state affairs to realize that this is what millions of Chinese people are eating up, and to know that this has made over a hundred million dollars and broke every record in its native country just bewilders me.  

As for Jean-Claude Van Damme, he plays himself playing a nameless villain Pancake Man fights at the very end of the film. The fight lasts maybe two or three minutes at most. If you saw and were disappointed by Van Damme's appearances in Welcome to the Jungle and Swelter, you'll be glad (I guess) to hear that he kicks more and does more of what you're hoping he'll do in this thing. It's just over so quickly. It's not worth the price of admission, frankly, unless you're a diehard fan (like I've always been). A funny thing about the film is that a Chinese pop band (four dudes with ultra stylish hair and make-up) shows up immediately after Van Damme gets knocked out by Pancake Man, and their purpose in the film was simply to upstage him for the bigger-and-better cameo (at least to the Chinese audience, who cheered when these guys came into the picture), and one of their songs plays on the soundtrack to highlight their gorgeousness. When Pancake Man greets them (they have no purpose in the film other than to simply appear and disappear), they smile and chat with him for a second, and that's when I noticed their teeth. The true mark of Communism is bad teeth, and that's when the film got my first and only laugh. I dunno, guys. This movie's the pits, but if you feel you need to go there, then go there. I did. And I'll never forget the experience.