Holy shit Jean-Claude Van Damme is awesome. He was recently in the UK for a special black tie event where the Muscles From Brussels talked about his incredible journey through life, took questions and met the fans along with a multiple course dinner and auction of memorabilia. Word was that JCVD veered away from the typical inspirational stories of his Hollywood career and opted to try and share bits of worldly wisdom from his up and down, rock and roll life. While Van Damme's blend of simple logic meets seemingly incomprehensible philosophical garble can be confusing to the uninitiated, he's one of the most eloquent, funny and smart (versus intelligent) speakers out there. What he says just makes sense while making you reflect. Like his view of being envious versus jealous as one is like looking around you but the other is akin to staring in a rear view mirror and not seeing what's happening in front of you. Or not eating too much meat because animals have eyes and eyes mean they have a soul. Fantastic stuff. On the professional front, a reteaming with Pound of Flesh producer Kirk Shaw and director Ernie Barbarash for an Antwerp set heist flick is in the works as is a potential weekly series for Ridley Scott where Van Damme would play a movie star moonlighting as a spy.
We're only a couple of weeks from Star Wars: The Force Awakens! To prep, we've started watching the previous flicks but not in release or chronological order. You see, there's this thing called Machete Order where you watch Episode IV, V, II, III then VI while not bothering with I. This way, you get more to the heart of Anakin's path to Darth Vader while then following son Luke to figure out what happened to his father before realizing, Darth Vader is his father. The theory excludes Episode I: The Phantom Menace for various reasons like many of the characters dying or not appearing later, not seeing Jake Lloyd as Anakin and much less of fan non-favorite Jar Jar Binks. We did it a little different and started with IV: A New Hope then V: The Empire Strikes Back but went back to I and then II: Attack of the Clones. Fueled by turkey, Chinese food, whiskey and Death Star shaped ice, it was time to go back to "A long time ago in a galaxy far, far away...":
- Using John William's epic score then the Star Wars title card and scrawling text starts each movie in a fantastically grand manner. I can only imagine what the response will be if J.J. Abrams uses the same opening. Lightsabers, popcorn and human fluids are sure to go flying.
- Star Wars is Star Wars, a great adventure that brings together a crew of memorable characters, puts them in precarious situations then celebrates their victory. Where's Chewie's medal?!
- Empire Strikes Back, this is how you split up parties. Watching Han, Leia, Chewie and C-3P0 evade the baddies while Luke trains with Yoda keeps you interested throughout. Unlike say Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers where you could give a shit what Sam and Frodo are doing while Aragorn, Gimli and Legolas run around kicking ass.
- Frank Oz as Yoda is my spirit animal. What a performance, via a puppet no less.
- The Phantom Menace, I had not seen this movie in it's entirety since 1999. Liam Neesons is cool, Ewan McGregor is so young, Jake Lloyd isn't horrible, he's just a kid and the score is top notch. Jar Jar binks seems like the alien version of Michelle and Stephanie from Full House, "how rude!".
- The end lightsaber duel with Darth Maul is one for the history books.
- The podrace scene and Jar Jar's underwater city made for great Star Tours sequences.
- Podracer Clegg Holdfast's brief introduction is more entertaining than all of Attack of the Clones. - Attack of the Clones sucks. It looked fake as hell in 2002 and even worse today. Plus it's long as shit. Why would Natalie Portman fall in love with Hayden Christensen? He's such a whiner. The fan theory that Padme and Obi-Wan had an affair adds much more drama and interest to the deal.
- Ewan McGregor's mullet is BLEEP-ing phenomenal. Jesus Christ phenomenal.
- Yoda-Da Man! Remember those commercials? Phew, flashbacks!
Well that was a good use of a long weekend, two more movies, maybe a holiday special and an Ewok flick on deck. It was recently revealed that George Lucas asked pals Steven Spielberg, Robert Zemeckis and Ron Howard to direct the prequels but none of them wanted to be the follow up act and urged Lucas to direct himself. That didn't quite work out the way we all hoped but hey, he built a world and furthered technology so give him a break. And take it easy on Jake Lloyd, he was just a kid and he's a human being. Plus he was in Christmas movie masterpiece Jingle All the Way, what'd you ever do?!
With a long weekend filled with much eating, working out was essential. On Thanksgiving Day I hit the empty gym (it's always kinda empty at 5:30 AM) for a total body session to offset the impending feasts of bread, cheese, turkey, sides, pies and booze:
4 circuits took under 45 minutes and I was spent! Mixing up the functional exercises with cardio helped keep my heart rate up and focus sharp. Moving from station to station keeps the mind occupied while going from upper body to lower to cardio keeps the body guessing.
On Friday morning I was a bit sore from the day before so taking a page from Creed, opted for a boxing themed workout in the complex gym:
Shoulder Circuit - 30 seconds each of various shoulder moves like side/front/rear laterals, "climbing" a ladder, etc. You can do these without weights or some light dumbbells to get warmed up. Then it was 3 rounds of jump rope, you can do this for time (2-3 minutes) or skips, say 300. After that it was 3 minutes of burpees where you aim for reps, 10-20, then rest for the remaining seconds. 3 rounds of shadow boxing then 3 rounds of Thai boxing with some knees and finished off with 3 more rounds of jump roping and abs.
It's easy to stuff your face then figure you can take the long weekend or holidays off, but just get back to it the next day. Lying on the couch watching movies and reading was terrific but I still managed to get off my duff 3 of the 4 days so don't use the holidays as a crutch, workouts only take an hour!
"Behold! Beta Ray Thor, harbinger of cosmic justice and butter!"
Ah Thanksgiving, the mightiest of holidays as there's no gifts or religion required, only those you care about and you're expected to gorge and be gay (as in merry, do better). All my years of Food Network watching has prepared me well for the day as the turkey came out quite well once again. Since I don't brine or baste, I go with herb butter under and on top of the skin, a little trick one Tyler Florence taught me. Taking fresh thyme, rosemary and sage, I mashed the aromatic greens bits into some softened butter. From there, just run your hand gently under the skin to separate it from the meat and plop in bits of your fancy butter then coat the skin with it along with salt and pepper.
This year I got a bird just under 13 pounds after realizing 16 was too Damme big for only a handful of people like last year. I used chunks of carrots, onion, celery and apples as a roasting tray to keep the bird off the bottom and having it steam. Of course rinsing and patting the turkey dry is key so your butter and seasonings don't simply slide off. For the cavity it was a poultry blend of herbs along with some onion and apple. Genius struck as I realized I had a pack of uncured bacon in the freezer and used it to protect the breast instead of a tin foil tent. In hindsight I should have latticed the strips to form a blanket as simply draping the strips across the top and front resulted in many slices slipping off. No matter, the skin was nice and crisp, the meat juicy and moist.
Side dish wise I never get too crazy, mashed cauliflower along with some instant stuffing and mashed potatoes does the job. I was quite disappointed that Food Network was not showing Thanksgiving themed shows and specials all day but Jean-Claude Van Damme's drunk dancing in Kickboxer followed by snake punching in Hard Target saved the day. Hope you had a great one and are enjoying the leftovers!
After the less than thrilling Spectre and Hunger Games, it was up to Creed to reverse the Fall Flicks slump. I'd been looking forward to the new Rocky flick for a while as the story seemed to be taking the character in a reasonable new direction while injecting some fresh blood. 2006's Rocky Balboa was a solid end to the saga, wrapping up the underdog story by showing the character as an aging, grieving but still hungry man meeting a new challenge. Bringing in former rival turned coach and friend Apollo Creed's son could have been a cheap cash in but franchise super fan turned writer/director Ryan Coogler along with co-scripter Aaron Covington along with stars Michael B. Jordan and Stallone craft an excellent chapter that harkens back to the original's dramatic set up while still delivering pugilistic excitement. Coogler is a tremendous filmmaker as the flick looks slick yet feels authentic and the use of music, slow motion, long takes, etc is superb. While the story treads familiar ground like daddy issues, living up to your name, a convenient yet believable romance; the film is rousing, inspiring, funny and exciting when it needs to be. While I almost shed some dude tears at the end and the film soared at parts, I wasn't engaged the entire runtime. Probably because Adonis and Bianca's (Tessa Thompson) characters and ensuing romance wasn't as endearing as Rocky and Adrian's. I thought it was funny that Adonis Creed's fake name was Donnie Johnson (like Don Johnson, get it? You don't get it...) while wondering why there was no mention of Tony Burton's Duke the Trainer since he raised Apollo then took Rocky under his wing.
Not having to write or direct, Stallone is free to simply act and from his first line of dialog, reminds audiences why they love Rocky in the first place. The $37 million dollar film has already brought in $43 million and there's talk of Stallone being in the mix as Best Supporting Actor come award time. I thought 2006's Balboa was much more convincing with more heart and drama than 2008's overrated yet multi-nominated The Wrestler so here's hoping Stallone gets his critical due this time. It will be interesting to see what direction Creed moves to for a sequel. I vote putting him in the ring with Ivan Drago's son followed up by Michael B. Jordan tackling a sequel/reboot to Carl Weathers' awesomely 80's flick, Action Jackson.
I'm a week late on these bad boys but the year of Cons keeps on trucking! It was a double event weekend as we attended the inaugural Cosplay Expo in Van Nuys at the Japanese Garden last Saturday then trekked to Pasadena for Designer Con on Sunday. Friend and photographer extraordinaire Jeremy Rafanan was holding a workshop on photography for the Cosplay set and I moderated for him. I had no clue the Japanese Garden existed right off the 405 north of Los Angeles but it was beautiful. The organizers are to be commended for setting up such a well run show in such a memorable location. There was free parking, food trucks and shuttles at the bottom of the hill, a few vendors out front of the gates and episodes of anime playing inside the administration building. We caught a few minutes of Free! a random yet surprisingly interesting show about a high school swim club where chicks dig muscular forearms. We did a lap around the Garden with it's beautiful ponds filled with fish and graveled paths next to well manicured trees and shrubs. Jeremy's workshop was located in the tea house where he talked all things photography like how he got into snapping pics, equipment he uses, navigating shows big and small, the differences between say a convention and a movie premiere and working with cosplayers. It was a fantastic show and great to a friend sharing his knowledge and experience. Down at the food trucks I opted for a burger and loaded fries from a truck I can't recall the name of...good stuff but the fries could have been a little crispier since they were covered with so much.
On Sunday we made it to Pasadena in seemingly record time for Designer Con, a decent sized show I've never heard of that's been going strong for several years. Like an expanded Artist Alley, DCon was basically set up to showcase custom art, sculptures, toys and clothing. A lot of it was based on existing brands like Disney, Marvel, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles or He-Man but there was an abundance of original characters and very unique offerings. In the lobby was a Back to the Future themed art show along with a stage for panels. There were 300+ exhibitors on site and I was amazed at the range of items on display and for sale from prints to custom action figures. One of my favorites was comic book covers recreated using Legos and another that was TMNT-centric from the film and original comic strip by Eastman and Laird. I rounded a corner and noticed a giant Captain Power display before realizing it was a booth from Gary Goddard's company! Of course I had just worked with Gary and Roger during the Masters of the Universe celebration so it was a terrific surprise to catch up with filmmaker Roger Lay, Jr. The Goddard Group is known for their theater and theme park attractions but they're now boosting their original content with new takes on Captain Power and Skeleton Warriors in the works.With two more shows, I think my tally is 21 for the year, phew!
You know how you just don't "get" stuff? Hunger Games is like that for me. I've seen each film in the theater to be a good partner but I honestly would have rather sat in the lobby reading a book then viewing the films. I've just never bought into the world, the stories or characters. Part 3 I surprisingly didn't mind but that was deemed the weakest of the films up to that point, so go figure. This gave me hope for the final installment but nope, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay - Part 2 put me to sleep. Literally. On three separate occasions. The first half is literally a bunch of white folks sitting or walking around doing nothing in particular. Oh there's a black character here and there but this future is real white. There's flourishes of excitement like an Aliens style sequence in a sewer with some I Am Legend style white skinned, ravenous, flesh eating creatures but for the most part, I just looked around or nodded off. Every time I see Josh Hutcherson, I feel like he should play Dolph Lundgren's runt of the litter son. The highlight was probably during the trailers when people started to slow clap after Star Wars: The Force Awakens.
Rumors started to circulate last week that an A-list actor was HIV positive. A friend said they heard it was Charlie Sheen. That somehow didn't surprise me, I was actually kind of surprised it wasn't announced he had some other life threatening disease already. I mean let's face it, Charlie Sheen has partied. Partied HARD since he was a teenager. After a string of excellent performances and working with top Hollywood talent in the likes of Red Dawn, Platoon, Wall Street, The Rookie, Major League and Navy Seals, Sheen found further fame and huge fortune on television. His salary on hit sitcom Two and a Half Men peaked in 2010 where he was the highest paid actor on television, earning $1.8 million an episode. Public meltdowns, messy divorces, sex with hookers and porn stars, a drinking habit along with drug use led to multiple stints in rehab and his ultimate firing from the show. Sheen went on an epic crusade to clear his name, participating in eternally entertaining and quotable interviews where he claimed to be a "Vatican Assassin", had "tiger blood and Adonis DNA", was a "bitching rock star from Mars" while using a drug called "Charlie Sheen". A nationwide tour failed to cement his status as a truth saying messiah for our times and before you knew it, Sheen was cleaned up, apologizing on TV and back with a new show, Anger Management. I absolutely LOVED Two and a Half Men and refused to watch it after Sheen was replaced by Ashton frigging Kutcher because it just wasn't funny anymore without the star.
Cut to today and Sheen announced on the Today show that he is HIV positive and has known for the last four years. He's been under watchful medical care and treatment to the point the disease isn't even detected in his blood. Sheen used the forum to explain that he's taken the illness very seriously, alerted those closest to him along with potential sexual partners. That has opened him up to betrayal and blackmail shakedowns that have cost him and his five kids nearly $10 million dollars. But his private physician was quick to point out that Sheen does not have AIDS, the auto-immune disease that was seen as a death sentence in the 80's and 90's before proper treatment became the norm. Sheen is now using the attention to fight the stigma and shame HIV still causes in some people's minds. Hopefully having a famous face will encourage others to seek help and not keep a dangerous secret to themselves that endangers others. During the interview, Sheen's wit, passion and personality shined through in a very difficult and private time. He is who he is and isn't hiding. Good for you, Mr. Sheen, still the man.
I can't recall whose book it was I was reading on the ol' Kindle when an offer for My Husband, My Friend: A Memoir by Neile Adams McQueen popped up. It's running for a "can't not buy" price of $2.51 and was well worth the money. I'd seen Neile Adams in plenty of interviews about her late husband Steve and knew she was instrumental to his career and there from the start. The book gives you equal shares of biographical accounts of her and her world famous husband. She was doing quite well for herself as a dancer based out of New York City, making 10x what Steve was and got her agents to give the unconventionally handsome actor a shot. It's interesting to see how their lives changed as McQueen became more and more famous thanks to TV show Wanted: Dead or Alive and hit movies The Magnificent Seven, The Great Escape, The Thomas Crown Affair and Bullitt among many more. From a small, cramped apartment to multiple homes around California, the two shared a crazy 15 years together.
Neile really highlights the not so glamorous side of being married to a movie star, especially one from a broken home with insecurity issues and a drug habit that included weed, LSD and cocaine. McQueen fell into the trappings of fame, feeling the need to prove his manhood and show the world that he was as sexy as they thought he was. Infidelity plagued the relationship but the one tryst Neile indulged in with Maximilian Schell nearly unraveled her philandering, movie star husband. Neile paints McQueen as funny, caring and adventurous but at the same time extremely insecure and vain as evidenced by his obsession with working out, staring in the mirror and keeping up with all the latest trends in youth culture and fashion. As the years went by and drug use continued, McQueen began to grow extremely paranoid, unable to keep many friends or get excited over movie projects.
References are made to co-star and neighbor James Garner as they were good social friends whose social relationship crumbled after Garner accepted a role McQueen passed on. It would take two years for McQueen to forgive Garner for the inane grudge. Paul Newman served as an early inspiration and mental rival to McQueen but the two eventually became friends over racing and cars then co-starred in mega hit The Towering Inferno after a team up in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid faltered due to McQueen's ego. Dustin Hoffman gets an interesting shout out as McQueen and Neile enjoyed The Graduate but McQueen couldn't believe such a non-handsome guy would ever challenge the dreamy ruggedness of himself or Newman. There's also several amusing references and examples of Steve McQueen's hippy speak that included quotes like "see where this kid's head's at" or "getting clean" as in making amends and personal favorite, "I needs mah time to howl, woman!". As Neile was with McQueen for Magnificent Seven and The Great Escape, it would have been nice to hear more about those sets or co-stars like Charles Bronson and James Coburn. Besides that, a quick and informative read with a somewhat sad behind the scenes look at living in the spotlight.
When we toured the apartment complex that would become our home, the manager showed us the small gym and "The Arnold", a chrome, multi-station gym popular in the 80's. It matched the decor of the building as it was built in I believe 1983 and hasn't changed much. The metallic contraption reminded me of high school when I worked out on a Universal machine in the weight room. It was pretty all encompassing with weighted stacks for Leg Press, Bench Press, Pull Downs, Shoulder Press, Cable Curls along with a Chin and Dip bar. Multiple participants could work out simultaneously and get in a good pump by simply moving around the stations. Universal Gym Equipment was founded by Harold Zinkin in 1957 after Zinkin spent decades lifting weights at Muscle Beach and was the first Mr. California bodybuilding champion in 1941. Wanting to expand the work out business and make strength training safe for novices, he developed weight machines where stacks of iron rode steel guideposts so you couldn't drop it on yourself. Instead of changing plates or dumbbells, you just popped a pin into the stack and kept pumping. The standard Universal Gym had 8 to 10 exercises attached to it's large frame. But rival Nautilus came a calling in the 80's (even though their one exercise machines were kinda lame) and by 1998, Zinkin was retired and Universal was acquired by Flexible Flyer and then Nautilus in 2006.
After working out on the Universal Machine in high school, I don't think I ever saw one in a gym again. One day driving I saw one in front of a garage and in workout videos featuring the likes of Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jean-Claude Van Damme, Sylvester Stallone and Bill Wallace. While the machine in our complex is actually an old and dusty Paramount, it still works just fine but is missing the Chin and Dip bars sadly. I like the fact that it's a bit of a relic because it alienates young Thundercats who don't have a f*cking clue how to use it and choose to plod along on the treadmill instead while still being fat and out of shape. Sadly, the times are a changing and the Paramount is going away. The property manager is redoing the gym with new equipment in their first phase of fixing up the joint so they can charge us more rent. I'll be sad to see the Paramount go away because it really is a great piece of equipment. I wonder how much and how long it will take to haul away because you're talking about thousands of pounds of weights and room filling metal frame to dismantle. It's time like these I wish I had a house and could put it in the driveway. Thanks for the muscle memories, Universal!
Here's kickboxing champion Bill "Superfoot" Wallace using a Universal. Personally I wouldn't do straight sets as you can see how much time is wasted just in resting. You could easily turn this into a circuit by simply moving from station to station, alternating muscle groups and exercises.
El Rey is an awesome channel. They show badass flicks like The Terminator, Big Trouble In Little China, Showdown In Little Tokyo, Red Sonja and many more in beautiful widescreen and digitally cleaned up. If you like horror movies, they've got you covered. Kung-fu flicks? Of course. And Miami Vice reruns are in regular rotation. One of their signature original programs is The Director's Chair where owner and host Robert Rodriguez sits down with other filmmakers to discuss their craft.
Cinematic icons and alumni include John Carpenter, Quentin Tarantino, Robert Zemeckis and George Miller. During their Labor Day marathon of Rocky flicks, clips of an upcoming episode featuring Sylvester Stallone were placed throughout and now you can watch it for free! It's an intimate setting with just the host and guest speaking about careers, inspirations, methods and influence. For Stallone, the program stuck mainly to the basics of Rocky, Rambo and The Expendables with no mention of hit sequel to Saturday Night Fever, Staying Alive. Since writing and starring in the Oscar winning and box office breaking Rocky, Stallone has never quite been given his due credit. One of the earliest franchises to grace cinema screens, it's easy to forget that Rocky truly was a million to one shot as Stallone wouldn't sell the script if he wasn't starring. When you think of film directors; a paunchy, nebbish, less than physical specimen wouldn't be a stereotype. But when you think that Stallone wrote and directed crowd pleasers with heart and action like Rocky III, IV, Rambo and The Expendables with a given scene requiring 9 cameras, complicated choreography and getting punched in the head while being in peak physical condition, it's a shame and a double standard that he isn't given more credit. Even after number one movies in five decades, the only actor with three franchises, boatloads of money and worldwide fame, the guy still manages to inspire. Check out the episode in its entirety below or over at El Rey and find out what all the fighting and fuss is about.
The Director's Chair: Sylvester Stallone - Full Episode
By order of Robert Rodriguez we're making the next episode of The Director's Chair, featuring Sylvester Stallone, available for FREE! Watch the entire episode right here, right now!
Posted by El Rey Network on Tuesday, November 10, 2015
While the era of big screen high kicking and martial arts
ended in the 90’s with Jean-Claude Van Damme and Steven Seagal going straight
to video, director Isaac Florentine and athletic star Scott Adkins have been keeping
the genre alive. After well received efforts like the Undisputed sequels and Ninja
series, Florentine and Adkins are back with Close
Range, a low budget action fest bound to please hardcore fans. A modern day
spaghetti western, the Chad Law and Shane Dax Taylor scripted flick finds the bearded and
mean mugging Adkins as Colton MacReady, an AWOL soldier who rescues his
kidnapped niece from a powerful Mexican cartel. MacReady accidentally comes
into possession of a flash drive containing sensitive material and becomes the
target of a well-armed hit squad complete with freeze frame introductions for guys who will get real dead, real soon.
After an office set opening sequence that
sees Adkins dispatch of multiple goons via kicks, knees, joint locks and
multiple stab wounds; the action shifts to a secluded farm house. The setting
highlights the low budget while showcasing bounds of fist, feet, blade and
bullet infused mayhem. There’s plenty of impressive stunts like jumping on and
over a moving car and running up a wall while a truck crashes into it. The
fights have evolved from Undisputed’s
overlong kickboxing style matches into Mixed Martial Arts infused scraps with
chokes, throws and acrobatic grace. It’s all impressively choreographed but
looks incredibly staged, hearkening back to Floretine’s overly hyper work on the
Mighty Morphin Power Rangers
franchise. But with so much Boom Boom Boom but not much heart, it's hard to stay overly invested. Adkins has displayed more physical chops if not the charisma of his idol
Jean-Claude Van Damme but does well enough looking tough and grunting dialog in
between fight scenes. In true 90’s throwback fashion there’s a nonsensical
shirtless scene to show off Adkins’ time in the gym. Familiar faces Nick
Chinlund (Con Air) and Jake La Botz (Rambo) lend credibility to the barely
there story as we wait to be pummeled by the next action overload. Get punched in the face and stabbed in the nuts December 4th when Close Range hits theaters and VOD.
